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Not confused
The life, loves, and beliefs of a bisexual feminist pagan
I am who and what I am
Recent Spells 
Blessed Be
Merry we meet, merry we part, merry met again!
12-May-08 04:42 pm - This week and pain [mother's day, pain]
Ugh.  There was this Girls' Night Out thing in the town we live in this week.  So, the female parental unit and I took my daughter to it.  This entailed doing a lot of walking.  A lot.  Like 2 1/2 hrs of WALKING.  That's more walking than I've done in a long time, since before my fibro diagnosis.  Then, for Mommy's Day we went to Snoqualmie Falls park.  Saw the waterfall.  It's beautiful.  I love waterfalls.  There's a 1/2 mile trail down to the river.  The hubs took the boys all the way down to the river, the daughter and I walked down to meet them as they were coming up, we got maybe a quarter of the way down.  And it was incredibly steep.  It sucked.  I was in pain on the way back up.  Then, we were driving all day.  About two hours over, and another two and a half to three hours drive back.  Plus it was chilly and damp up there.  Needless to say, I'm in pain today.  And now I have to clean the house, because the male parental unit is having some people from this study thing he's enrolled in come out for home visits, and the house has to be clean.  oh fucking yay.

I'm so freaking tired all the time still.  it sux. but, I'm back on most of my meds (not the topomax, because I haven't got any, and gotta get in to my neuro and get into the clinic and get it renewed).  Not my favorite clinic, but a necessary evil.

Not a whole lot of interesting today, I guess.
07-May-08 09:42 pm - now to discuss my health issues
Here is an alphabetical list of my current diagnoses (with commentary):


Cut for lengthCollapse )

Well, this is me.  Do with this what you will.

I mention in the first entry in the journal that I've created this journal for my health-related issues, and that I have another, older and much more written in, journal here. If you would like the name of it, I would be more than happy to give it to you in a message or a screened comment.  I am merely trying to protect myself from people in my "real" life who are not supportive of my attempts to heal. 
Not confused
06-May-08 10:40 pmSpell of the Day
There are a few things that make/have made, me who I am.  Most of them, I would not wish on my worst enemy.  One or two I would, and I'll explain that shortly.

Like I said, I've left out a lot, and I'll cover that in another entry.  This is already a short book.
Not confused
06-May-08 08:05 pm - I am me
Well, I wasn't thinking about the fact that to join most of the groups that I would like to join, I have to have some public entries here.  :(  Silly me, huh?

I'm in a stable, loving relationship right now, thank the blessed Goddess.  I have been through hell with men so much  in my life (most of my abusers have been men), that to finally have a decent man in my life.  He is loving and understanding most of the time.  And when he's not, he tries to be.  I don't know if he knows how much I appreciate that.

He's caring and loving when I have flashbacks either during or right after sex.  That's the worst.  I'm so terrified that he's going to get tired of the tears, the paranoia, the panic/anxiety attacks, and tell me that he's done.  That he can't handle it any more, and he's leaving.  THEN, he turns around and tells me that he has no problems with my bisexuality.  We actually had a long conversation the other night about the fact that I think I'm more polyamouros than monogamous, and  that I trust him, that what happened with my ex won't happen with him.  He, at this moment in time, has no intention of testing that out, tho.  I had to giggle the other night.  I had a meme that I had copied from another lj friend (yup, this isn't my only lj), one of those "finish the sentence" ones.  One of the sentences was "I have come to realize I have a crush on:" and I was reading him the beginnings, and having him finish the sentence.  They're fun.  And things like that help keep us talking about the important stuff, believe it or not.  ANYWAY, got sidetracked there.  I had to giggle at his response to that one.  :D  He mentioned my one friend who works with him.  If you guys could have seen his face.  I think he was afraid I was gonna be upset.  I wasn't, beause, as he said, it's been kinda obvious.  But I love him for worrying.  :D  That's ok, I didn't tell him who my crush is, even thought I think he knows.  I'm way too ashamed to admit I have a crush on his friend.

Guess I'll make another entry discussing my health issues.
Ritual performed on Apr 19th 2018, 7:08 pm GMT.